Have you been out today yet? Who was the first person you saw when you left your house? Did you know there is a word that describes that person? Well there is, it's-- --QUALTAGH!! Would you like to be a qualtagh? Why not get up early tomorrow, pick a random house, stand on the doorstep and wait... Then when the occupant finally comes out just flay your arms around wildly whilst shouting in their surprised face, "I'M A QUALTAGH!!!!" It sounds strange I know, but believe it or not this is how I met my wife... ...she's really fat now.